Oh, the feels. In one week, I managed to feel the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.

I think the hardest part of [dating] relationships is dealing with the reality that people will always disappoint you, no matter their intentions.

This week served as a reality check for me. I’m learning how to feel the disappointment, separating the constraints of a situation from me as a person and continue to move on with an optimism for what my future will hold.

Y’all, let me tell you…I’m starting to feel like it’s impossible to meet someone in NYC. Is it even possible to find someone who wants a genuine, authentic relationship? Is it possible to find a good man with a good heart in this fast-paced city?

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I think the hardest part about this journey to “finding #theone” is dealing with the reality that 98% of relationships you enter will result in failure.

But sometimes, you get caught off guard and there’s this exciting feeling of potential that forms in your spirit. It awakens you. You know that feeling of meeting someone you instantly click with? Your humor, experiences and vision for your future seems to align from the onset. The witty banter is there. The texting chemistry is on point and when you decide to call them, that first conversation becomes a 2.5 hour conversation that dives into your work as a teacher, past relationships, what makes you happy and what you want in your future?

As you uncover each other’s personalities, you begin to realize that there could be something there. Each day passes and you find yourself thinking about them more and more. The daily texts begin to become routine and you can’t wait to get home so that you can call them.

For a week, you end your day by calling them and the last voice you hear is theirs.

The conversations start to include things like…”We should do that in the future. I want to make this for you. I can’t wait to show you this.” And so with this, you begin to develop trust and safety in this person. Crazy how one week can do this to you, right?

I think the worst part of it all, is knowing in the back of my head, that this had to be too good to be true.

And it was. Because in an instant, it was snatched. Shattered. A future they spoke of and you envisioned…instantly gone. All gone because of the realization that we lived 2 hours a part. When you live in NY, another borough can literally feel like another state. #sigh

While no one is to blame here, it doesn’t make the situation any less crappy.

I’m writing this to allow myself to feel the disappointment, but not get caught up in it. This is life, and it keeps moving. And when I’m sad, I just remember that I’m a bo$$ lady, a diva, and a woman that doesn’t need a man to feel happy. *hair flip*

The search continues y’all and stay tuned for a book in the works entitled “When You Know He’s #NotTheOne.” ‘Cause, Lord knows I’ve got enough material for a book now.

Anyway, here’s a look with one of my favorite pair of jeans and trends this season–embroidered denim, featuring a wall that is coming in to remind who I really am–a divaaaaa!

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What I’m wearing:

  • Old Navy off-the-shoulder top
    • On sale for $14.97 and literally the easiest, chicest top!
  • Mossimo embroidered denim
    • Target is having a BOGO denim deal! Buy one, get one 50% off! Do it!
    • Originally $32.99–a serious steal.
  • Caslon block heel
    • Sold out at Nordstrom
    • Vince Camuto peep toe bootie (great for fall) alternative, $89.90
    • Hinge block heel; on sale for $44
  • ZeroUv sunglasses
    • Literally my fave place to buy trendy sunglasses!
  • Forever21 blazer